Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Yesterday, October 14, 2009 was the day our baby was taken from me. We found out it was a girl.

The day before was the second day of dilation. We had to go back to the doctor's office to do this. It was the worst day. I was in so much pain the second they inserted the dilator in me. I threw up with the pain. They gave me a prescription for Vicodin, but it would take too long to get and for it to take affect, so they gave me a shot of Fentanyl and Toradol and said I should feel much relief in about 5 minutes....I never did. On the way home I took a Vicodin. It was only after an Anaprox, shot of Fentanyl and Toradol, and 2 Vicodins and 7 hours later did I feel enough relief to get out of the bed.

Yesterday and today has been ok pain wise. I got Pitocin, what they give to ladies to induce labor. I am also on an oral medication to make me have contractions to help control the bleeding. So, I only have occasional cramping pains...I guess this is what Braxton Hicks contractions might feel like?

I have received some beautiful flowers from friends...I have the best friends!!! Matt, my parents, and Kristy has taken great care of me. Lacy drove down from Austin to be with me yesterday and Matt's family came over for dinner last night and brought a Maggie Moo's ice cream cake.

Nights seem to be the hardest. It is when I lay in the bed and it's quiet that I have a chance to think about what has happened in our lives. I know God has a plan for us, but it's still so hard to think about losing this baby girl and what great plans and things we had for her.